August 8, 2007

Poetry, pt. 2

Posted in Poetry at 10:55 pm by Caleb Winn

Descent Into Kelp

Cool comfort glides on ocean’s breeze
While sweet sun smiles as on a friend
Above the water; float through life with ease

But strange how simple objects bend
And break as liquid meets the light
Within the water; turn the world on end

As murky dusk becomes dark night
True vision fades when I descend
Beneath the water; darkness drowns the light. 

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4 Comments »

  1. Phillip Winn said,

    A poem that needs to be explained is no good. Fortunately, I don’t think your poem needs to be explained.

    So don’t explain it!

  2. Caleb Winn said,

    Ok. Explaination is gone.

    Also, I reworked the 1st stanza.

  3. Phillip Winn said,

    I think it’s better. I think it’s quite good. Of course, I’m just me. Others? You’ll have to wait to see if they comment. 🙂

  4. heather said,

    I love the words “murky” and “kelp.” You are a wonderful poet, I didn’t know that.


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